Thursday, 3 October 2013

7Y3 Performance Poem

Hello 7Y3, 

Here is the poem that you and I created in this morning's lesson. Please feel free to comment on this post and share anything you think about the poem. What aspects of the poem do you like and why? 
What would you change if you had written it or had the chance? 



Cool breezes gently hug warm bodies
Hills roll to the distance
Snow on mountain tops like a dusting of icing sugar on a slice of cake
Clouds cover summits as bubbles do in bathtubs
Lakes are grand puddles on earth’s rocky surface

Stunned silence
Open mouths like muted screams
Peaceful mood
Breath taken
Wonder

Melting pot of accents
Sharing experiences
Chit chatting, chirpy conversations
Rolling eyes from bored faces
Ears protected from mind-numbing attacks

Yawns supressed
Hoodies are blankets over sleeping bodies
The sand man has visited the sleepers
Some catch zzzzz’s
Out like a light

Paris purrs
City of lights
Sky scrapers
Romance is in the air

Pickpockets 

By 7Y3 & Mr Brown

8 comments:

  1. Yay first comment! I like Paris purrs because it reminds me of my cat and I like just the single word. Pickpockets.
    Leonie

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  2. I like the part when it says 'Stunned silence' and 'Open mouths like muted screams' because it reminds me of when I broke my arm at gymnastics and there was silence in the gym for a moment or two and I saw that my friends had their hands over their mouths.

    By Olivia Thompson

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  3. Heya, I think those are really good. Like Olivia, I like the 'Open mouths like muted screams' but for me it really gives me a good picture and also makes me think of that picture called the scream or something. Plus, I really like 'Melting pot of accents' because its a really nice phrase.

    From Anton! :)

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  4. the 2 that caught my eye were
    chit chatting, chirpy conversations, it's describes my personalty plus its got alliteration
    melting pots of accents, its really imaginative like it makes you think about it really

    from patience

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  5. Thanks for your comments ladies, interesting that you have picked out these pieces of imagery.

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  6. Clouds cover summits as bubbles do in bathtubs is my favourite line in this poem

    from abbey

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  7. Pickpockets. That is my favourite word because it reminds me of Oliver Twist as they used to pick money out of rich peoples pockets.

    How do you sign in to the English blog so I am not anonymous.
    Abida Rashid
    7F

    ReplyDelete